Gorilla Mask's Annual "Web Tard
Competition"
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 VOTING
FOR 2005 IS NOW COMPLETE! CONGRATS TO "BOOM
GOES THE DYNAMITE!" LET THE SEARCH FOR 'WEB TARD 2006'
BEGIN.
Every
year, the beauty of the Internet glistens more and more, and not through
file sharing clients, search engine innovations, increased browser
competition, or even the collective sperm on keyboards everywhere. Technological advances are peppered throughout the cyber galaxy, but the
true sugar in the web's virtual spice rack is its ability to apply not
just a transparent door outside the dwellings of introverted closet weirdos, but place a ridiculously strong magnifying glass on its
peephole. That's right, just like a bad science fiction movie, the
'Net has come back to haunt its creators: No dork is safe from
online exposure.
Each calendar year it seems
like one phenome-nerd leaves the rest in the dust, becoming a mainstream
Internet figure practically overnight. It's time we take a slight
break from laughing, and celebrate the dumbassery these dolts display.
Gorilla Mask's "Annual Web
Tard Competition" honors the best in traumatic, life-altering web
exposures, and the award itself is designed to pay homage to one
pathetic individual, but the competition as a whole also acts as an ode
to the web's ability to bring us finger-pointing entertainment we never
would have experienced in the pre-net days.
2005 NOMINEES:
-- PAST WINNERS --
Honored posthumously of
course, since this feature was created long after their e-murders.
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